in the mid eighteen-hundreds when the engagementring tradition first picked up in the united states, some men sported them. but it didn'ttake long for engagement rings to become a woman exclusive piece of jewelry. in the nineteen twenties, nineteen twenty-sixto be precise, american jewelers got together and figured out a new strategy for maximizingtheir bottom line. sell engagement rings for men. in order to make this happen the jewelryindustry had a few major marketing hurdles that it had to overcome. much as it stillis today, engagement is something that happens to a woman by virtue of a man presenting herwith a ring. marry me suzie! who's suzie? on top of that wearing jewelry and rings wassomething considered feminine. it wasn't until
even the nineteen forties that husbands beganwearing wedding bands. what this national campaign to sell men's engagement rings wastasked with was creating an entirely new tradition that in no way would threaten the masculinityof these future husbands of america. so you see examples of advertising tactics sellingthese rings as a way for guys to elevate their masculinity. a knight riding off into battle,while wearing an engagement ring. jewelers touting the fact that their men's engagementrings were made from manly materials like iron and bronze. men's ring styles were evengiven names like the pilot, the executive, the stag! [cough]. but what the jewelry industrydidn't anticipate were a couple of fatal flaws that doomed the men's engagement ring campaign.market research had also found that if a guy
found out that his fiance was going to buya ring for him he would have put a stop to it. it was often left up to her to guess hisring size and the style that he would like because again if she asked him what kind ofring he would like he would probably say, 'the only ring i want is no ring honey.' 'butsam.' 'who's sam?' gender roles were still very much entrenched to where women were incontrol of childcare and the domestic, men were meant to go out and work and then probablyafterwards simply socialize with his male buddies. while securing a woman's hand inmarriage by giving her a ring was something to be proud of, being given a ring by a womanand signifying to the world that you were about to become someone's husband not so much.pretty soon thereafter the jewelry industry
figures out that the male engagement ringcampaign is a total flop. and once the great depression happens they simply refocus theirenergies on the bridal market. now to understand why most american men today still don't wearengagement rings, it's helpful to look at why they began wearing wedding bands in thenineteen forties and fifties. post-world war ii prosperity and it's attendant migrationtoward suburbia along with the rise of what's called domestic masculinity and the companionatefamily set the social stage for what were called double ring weddings. weddings as wewould think of them today wherein both the bride and the groom are given rings to puton. while the american jewelry industry and advertising certainly played a role in sellingwedding bands to me, it was also our culturally
evolving idea of what a husband should bethat helped cement that new tradition. the ideal married man was more domestic and companionatethan ever before and so it made sense that he would wear a wedding band symbolizing hisconnection not only to the marriage unit and his wife but also to his family, to his house,to the suburban ideal of post-war america. when it comes to engagement rings the heterosexualdating script that leads up to marriage hasn't really changed all that much outside of welltindr and texting. men still do a majority of the asking whether it's for a first dateor for someone's hand in marriage. even though you see jewelry companies today every nowand then trying to push mangagement rings, it's not so common. will it ever be? guysdo you want engagement rings?
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